Women don’t climb ladders

How many times have you heard a man say, “I’m not sick”? They say it because they don’t want to be sick and, if they are sick, they don’t want to know about it.

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The Girl on the rock

The answer to the old boys’ question, “Who do we get to spend eternity with?” is everyone we ever loved. All the moments of your life that were given to, shared with a specific person can only belong to that person.

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Elderly Drivers – Use Two Pillows And Stay Alert!

We don’t need maximum speed limits anymore; we need minimum speed limits so your car doesn’t stall out while you’re trapped behind an 80-year old driver.

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Purchasing power petering out

I know the Cardinal Rule of sales – never be afraid to ask for the order. Rule #2 – never look away once you’ve asked for the order, it’s a sign of weakness.

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If Music be the Fodder of War… Stop the Bombing

Music can lift your spirits and improve your attitude except Debbie Boone’s “You Light Up My Life” damn near put me in therapy.

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Hustlers On Speed Dial

First there was the young guy waving an empty gas can in the parking lot of the Lisbon airport, asking me for 10 Euros. Good story, nice prop – I believe he was the same guy who stung me last time.

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Passing Book Judgements

Books are supposed to be written to enlighten and entertain. They are not designed to make men cross their legs until the sympathetic pain goes away.

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Message In A Bottle: Love Or Possible Groin Injury

A few years ago, a message in a bottle washed up on my beach here at Sunset Bay, Wainfleet. So I waded into the water and spotting paper inside, I ripped away at the cap thinking I’ve just come into possession of a winning lottery ticket or the map to the Lost Dutchman Gold Mine.

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I’m no longer smart enough to drive a car

On the outside it looks like a small SUV, but on the inside it’s actually the control centre for Spectre.

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Oldest performing clown dies

The World’s Oldest Performing Clown, Creeky was still making ‘em laugh at 95 years of age.

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